Say Goodnight Together

During our first few years of marriage, my husband Ted’s favorite late night companion was the website Free Republic.

Free what?

Free Republic. That would be an online gathering place for the politically conservative to discuss the latest in politics.

You see, prior to our union, freeping – as it’s called – was Ted’s go-to, end-of-the-day, wind-down activity. One that he brought with him into our marriage. Most nights, after I went to bed, he’d still be curled up on the couch with his laptop (yep, those were the dark days before iPads) having “spirited conversations” with other freepers.

While there wasn’t necessarily anything wrong with this in his pre-Ashleigh days or even in moderation after our wedding, it meant that our heads rarely hit the pillow at the same time. Maybe one or twice a week. Most evenings I’d head to bed, while he logged in a few more hours of screen time.

Perhaps you can relate. It could be that after that initial newlywed bliss wore off, you and your spouse have discovered that syncing your bedtime routines is a challenge. If so, I’m here to encourage you.

You see, things are now different at our house. Almost twelve years into our marriage, it’s rare if we don’t climb under the covers together. These days, when we say goodnight, it’s lights out for both of us. (Although, I’ll admit that lately we’ve both been spending a few minutes before drifting off to sleep playing Frozen Free Fall on our iPads. It’s rather addicting, you see.)

So how did we get from there to here?

The #1 thing that’s aided us in this change has been … drum roll, please … being intentional to end each day with a shared activity.

The truth is, I don’t remember what year in our marriage this started, but I’d venture to guess it was when Ted got me hooked on 24. Suddenly Free Republic took a backseat to Jack Bauer and I gave myself a later bedtime. Before long, our default at the end of a long day was to retreat to the couch … together.

[Read the rest of the article at Start Marriage Right.]